How to Make Relationships Last

Relationships are made beautiful when two people come together to share their love for one another. Often, due to fickle differences, the love shared gets lost. This article will teach young lovers on how to keep the flame of their relationship aglow.

1. Honesty

Be honest in your relationship. When two people, from different walks of life, come together to share their love, honesty is the only thing that keeps the relationship from falling apart. With honesty comes trust and with trust, love grows over time. Sowing the seeds of dishonesty will only lead to heartache and broken relationships.

2. Acceptance

Don’t hold impossibly high ideals, when it comes to assessing your partner. It will only lead to disappointment. You should understand that every individual is different and it is their imperfections that make them endearing to us over time. So what if your girlfriend hates playing video games, or thinks that your friends are stupid. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. Accept her for what she is and you will see how strong your relationship grows with time.

3. Communicate

Most relationships go awry because both parties in the relationship assume their partner would automatically know what they are feeling. Instead, why don’t you try telling her how she makes you feel? Communication is the key to any relationship. You are not all-knowing, so without communicating your feelings to her, do not expect a lost -lasting relationship.

4. Compromise

Accept the fact that you are not perfect. The chances offighting like cats and dogs are enormous. However, knowing when to accept your fault and when to compromise on a certain situation will take your relationship to a long way. A relationship is supposed to be fulfilling enough to complete you. If being in a particular relationship makes you happier than you have ever been, you need to stand by that relationship. If, however, being with her makes you compromise your own happiness, it is not worth the effort.

5. Maintain Sexual Attraction

In a relationship, sex is beyond the physical gratification. It is the means by which two individuals express their feelings for each another. So, it is very important to be able to keep the passion ignited. Sex is the perfect way to tell your partner how she makes you feel. Not only does it bring two individuals closer, but also bridges any significant gap that might’ve cropped up over time. As the years go by, you'll keep revisiting and re-imagining the passion you have for each other. And if you keep at it, you'll have a sex life that transcends your relationship’s lack of newness and the physical changes that come with time.

A relationship is like a delicate flower. It needs tender and loving care to blossom. By following the above-mentioned methods, you are much closer to ensure that your relationship lasts a long time, even eternity.

Questions 31

I am 21 and so is my wife. We are newly married and had sex between the fifth and ninth day of her menstrual cycle. She hasn’t got her period thereafter. We suspect she is pregnant but we are not ready to have a child. Please suggest some medication to terminate her pregnancy. I hope it doesn’t have any side-effects.   Did you count the days correctly? The first day is when she experiences pain and a light discharge. Confirm using a urine pregnancy kit. See a gynaecologist; she will be able to advise you on medical termination.

I am 70 years old and my wife is 60. You always suggest KY Jelly for lubrication but it isn’t available in medical stores any more. Please suggest an alternative and also some Ayurvedic capsules that will help me get a good and strong erection.   
Lubic gel is available with most chemists; you could also use your saliva, any oil or even butter as a lubricant. Take Tentex ROYAL 2 capsules for 15 nights and then have one on the days you want to have intercourse.  

I am 25 years old and will be married soon. The day of our wedding is the 12th day of her menstrual cycle. We don't want a child for at least two years nor do we want to use a condom. I have heard about some tablets that can be inserted into the vagina before sex to avoid pregnancy. Please tell me the name of the tablet and the proper way to use it. Will it harm my partner or affect our chances of pregnancy?
The barrier pill is called Today which can be inserted deep into her vagina fifteen minutes before having sex. However, it is not as effective as a condom or hormone pills like MalaD. I suggest that you use a condom from day 10 to day 15, counting from the start of her periods. On other days, you can use Today. She could see a gynecologist, who for a month before your marriage, can start her on a low dosage of hormone pills such as Ovral-L. She can stop using it after some months if she wishes. 

I am a 29-year-old man and have a good sex drive, get a steady erection and my penis is adequately long. But I lose stamina within six to seven strokes. Can you recommend any gel, cream or lotion?  

Do you mean you ejaculate soon or get tired? Exercise daily and maintain a wholesome diet. For early ejaculation, either take advice from a sexologist or search on the Internet for ways to heal premature ejaculation. Try Himcolin gel — apply it every night for 30 nights on the penile skin.

I am a 22-year-old man. Please explain the kegel method in detail.    

The aim of the exercise is to exercise the pubo coccyges muscle (PC). Twice a day, urinating, stop the flow and count 1,2,3; restart and repeat 7-8 times. This helps control premature ejaculation and in women, tones the vagina and helps her reach an orgasm. 

My husband works in another city and we visit each other over the weekends. We have been using condoms for our sexual encounters. However, we would like to stop using them now. Is it okay to use the women’s contraceptive ‘Today’ instead? Is it as safe at preventing pregnancy as a condom? I do not wish to get pregnant for the next two years. I have tried oral tablets and the contraceptive injection, but I have had severe side effects with these. Please help.Maintain a diary of your menstruation dates. If the cycle is of 28 days, then the first seven days (menstrual days) and last seven days are virtually safe during which you can risk having sex without a condom. However, from the eighth day till the 16th, definitely use a condom. For the rest of the days, insert the Today tablet deep into your vagina 15 minutes prior to the act as it destroys the sperms that try to reach the egg.


 I am 26 years old and my husband is 28. We have been together for a year now and our sex life has been good all this while. Recently, we had sex without a condom and both of us enjoyed it a lot. We were just wondering (other than using a contraceptive pill) is there any way we can have sex without the male/female condom? You can take the risk of having intercourse during the first seven days of your period (menstrual days) and the last seven days. Conception is not likely to occur. You can, on other days, except the tenth to the 15th day of your period, insert a tablet deep in vagina known as TODAY.


My wife and I are going off on our honeymoon next week. We’ve decided to have unprotected sex and are both virgins. We don’t want a baby for at least another year. What precautions should we take if I don’t want to wear a condom? If you do not want a pregnancy, wear a condom. If you are persistent, then after splitting her hymen by inserting your finger insert a TODAY tablet deep inside her vagina and wait for 15 minutes. Hope for the best because it’s not as effective as a condom.


We just completed our second wedding anniversary. We are planning a child now, so please tell us which are the best days for intercourse and how often should we engage? I had my periods last month on the 27th, and have normal cycles and no other health issues. Start to have intercourse from the eighth day, counting from the first day of your period, and then practise every alternate day until the next period. Do not expect results immediately.


I am a 30-year-old woman. I’ve been married for two years and my husband and I love each other very much but we haven’t been able to consummate our marriage. I experience a lot of pain whenever he attempts to penetrate and he loses his erection when he sees me in pain, as he is afraid to hurt me. He says I tighten my pelvic muscles too much. My gynaecological exam clearly notes that my hymen is broken but there seems to be no other problem. We’ve tried using Lubic gel but to no avail. What else can we do? Full marks to your husband. Make sure you both see a sexpert. In the meanwhile, apply xylocaine gel 2% in and around the vaginal opening. Wait for 15 minutes, wash it off and then insert your finger. You will feel no discomfort. Then ask your husband to insert his little finger and as you get comfortable, one by one, his larger fingers and then try intercourse.

Questions 30

I am 26 years old and my wife is 20. We recently got married and we enjoy a great sex life. Although we don’t use a condom, I never ejaculate inside her because we don’t want a baby any time soon. During sex, her vagina discharges a thick white or coloured fluid, but we continue with our sex. Will this harm me? Also, when I perform oral sex on her, her clitoris discharges fluids that I often swallow. Is it okay to do that?

The fluid is natural lubrication that all women have. It is harmless to swallow the same.


I am a 21-year-old girl. Can you please inform me about abortion pills and its side effects? Also, if the pregnancy test is negative and yet the periods are not happening, what does it mean?
Pills are very effective in terminating an early pregnancy. However, they may not always be effective as they can start an abortion but at times it is incomplete and heavy bleeding may occur, needing even hospitalisation. Always take these pills under a gynaecologist’s supervision. If tests indicate no pregnancy, the doctor will examine other causes for the missing periods.


I am a 30-year-old mother of two sons. I had a normal delivery for both my kids. Due to this I have lost tightness in my vagina. This has lead to an unsatisfying sex life with my husband. Is there a way that I could get the tightness back? Please help.
While passing urine stop the flow and count till three. Restart and repeat this five times.  Practise this exercise twice a day. You can also consider vaginal tightening. See a cosmetic surgeon.

I am a 32-year-old married man. I ejaculate within 30 seconds and that too, within just five strokes. Because of this, my penis has become small. I am tense. How can I satisfy my partner in the future?
Your penis cannot shrink. You must learn to have better control. Indulge in more foreplay to satisfy your partner. Apply Xylocaine gel 2% over the head of your penis. Keep it for 10 minutes and then wash it off. Now, insert gently with lubrication. Wait inside till you are in control and then stroke. You could also take a course of NEO tablets (Charak) — one tablet, thrice a day for six weeks. They must be taken half-an-hour before your meals.


I am 34 and my wife is 31. We were married last year. Since then, we have been trying to have a baby. We went to a doctor who advised me to take certain medicines (Fertisure M & Adizoa). My wife’s reports are all normal. Since the last month, I am suffering from erectile dysfunction. This problem occurs only on the days which are crucial for pregnancy. Is this due to the medicines or is it psychological? 
Forget doing it only on the fertile days. Enjoy sex. Do not do it as a duty. Have sex starting from the 8th day of her period (count from the very first day). Do it every alternate day till the start of her next. Remember you both come first, the baby next.



I tried having sex with my virgin partner but it was painful for her. Even inserting a finger caused her discomfort. Also, she has asthma. Is there any medication we can use?
Ask her to apply xylocaine gel 2% in and around the opening of the vagina after opening the lips of the lower part of the vagina. She should wash or wipe off the excess after15 minutes.

I am getting married soon. Are there chances of getting pregnant on the first night if we don't use protection? How can we safely avoid a pregnancy without taking pills? Do condoms prevent infections as well? What are safe days? he most fertile days are between the 10th and 15th day (counting from the first day of your period). You are less likely to get pregnant on other days. Condoms are virtually safe for preventing pregnancy and don’t cause any infections. In case you are prepared to take a risk with natural contraception, the first seven days (menstrual days) and last seven days are virtually safe.


I am meeting my man after two months. We want to enjoy sex to the fullest. But we don’t want to use a condom and I don’t want to take an emergency contraceptive pill in the morning. Is there any other way we can enjoy intercourse without risking pregnancy? Are there any tablets which I can insert into the vagina? You can insert a Today tablet deep in you vagina, fifteen minutes before intercourse. It is fairly safe on most days. But avoid using it from the 10th to the 15th day, counting from the very first day of the start of your period.


In your column, you always say that it is the art of love-making, which matters. Does size of penis not contribute at all to satisfying a woman? What is the ideal size of penis to derive maximum pleasure? The average length, which is four to six inches; a diameter of one inch can satisfy. You certainly don’t need the giant proportions people imagine.


My girlfriend tells me her anus is an erogenous zone, as it secretes fluid just like the vagina. She enjoys having anal sex. Is it safe as the anal region contains harmful germs, right? Do all the women enjoy this act? Are there any side effects if the vaginal fluid enters your mouth?
Anal sex is unsafe if not done without a condom. The anus also has pleasure nerves but I have not heard of any anal fluid. The vaginal fluid entering the mouth is harmless.